


Walls That Kept Him Hidden

by SlothPioneer (Anime_Otaku_OAO)



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Amnesia, Canon Compliant, F/F, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Rating May Change, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-11
Updated: 2021-03-08
Packaged: 2021-03-16 04:54:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 8
Words: 14,396
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28700994
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anime_Otaku_OAO/pseuds/SlothPioneer
Summary: “I can’t find Eren!” Mikasa all but screamed.She looked around the crowd frantically, looking for the mop of brown hair but to no avail.A canon divergence: What would have happened if Eren had been grounded the day of the Fall of Wall Maria? What if events led up to him never leaving Shinganshina with Armin and Mikasa forcing him to survive outside of Trost, with the titans, without any memories of his friends and family?
Relationships: Krista Lenz | Historia Reiss/Ymir, Levi/Eren Yeager, Mikasa Ackerman & Armin Arlert & Eren Yeager
Comments: 70
Kudos: 271





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone, hope you like the first chapter! I’m still not sure how long this fic will go on for, but I have the outline for much of it and some scenes already done. I will be following along with Canon plot points and trying to keep characters as in-character as possible even with the changes. My OTP is ereri but this will be a slow burn.
> 
> Enjoy :)

“Mikasa, sit down.”

“I can’t find Eren!” Mikasa all but screamed. 

She looked around the crowd frantically, looking for the mop of brown hair but to no avail. Opting to change her tactic, she looked for Eren's distinctly teal eyes or even Carla’s deep honey eyes and tied back brown-black hair.

Mikasa‘s steel eyes upon seeing no familiar faces reflected a mixture of concern for Eren and deepened with fury directed at Armin for having dragged her away to the boat without her brother. If only she had gone to the house to find him. Her thoughts strayed down dark paths, and her eyes darkened to almost black surfing through all of Eren’s possible current conditions. What if he was stuck under debris and needed help? What if one of the titans got hold of him? What if – Armin cut short her spiral. She had started staring a hole into the floor of the boat and was unresponsive.

“—kasa! Calm down, he’s probably just on another boat” He put on a reassuring smile, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes. He had to calm Mikasa down before she did anything drastic.

“But what if he isn’t?!” She could no longer control her emotions yet refused to look up.

“What if he’s at home waiting for me so he can leave together? What if he got into another fight on the way, you know he never wins without me!” A slight pressure on her left shoulder startled her, but once she looked up and saw Armin and the similar look of unease clouding his expression, she forced herself to calm down slightly. More so for him than as a genuine feeling of appeasement. The feeling of agitation she felt at the pit of her stomach never truly left.

“We’ll get through this. We will meet back up with him at the camp in Trost” Armin reasoned. With that, they both sat down on the antique wood of the boat bench, next to Armin’s Grandfather, and closed their eyes.

The lull in conversation allowed for the surrounding sounds to invade them both. The wind carried the traumatized murmurs of those that had witnessed the Titans first-hand. Some simply sobbed while others were too shocked to so much as blink let alone open their mouths. Some sat still with their mouths open wide but no sound coming out. During their exchange, they had failed to notice the rising of the bridge separating them from those still attempting to board the boat. They both opened their eyes at the sound of people screaming to save their children and put them on the boat. Those desperate enough attempted to jump across the gap between the ledge of the land and the boat but subsequently fell into the water below. This effectively cut off any chances of Eren joining, at least until they reached Wall Rose. Armin took hold of Mikasa’s hand and squeezed. All the while Mikasa looked off in the distance to the entrance to Shinganshina and used her free hand to bring her crimson scarf up over her nose and looked down at her feet. ‘We’ll find Eren— He’s safe… He has to be’.

* * *

Carla’s cries pierced the air. Eren felt helpless as the house fell to shambles over him, he just narrowly avoided the wooden beams that had once kept the house upright. His mom wasn’t so lucky.

He crawled his way out from under the littered stone and looked to his right.

‘Mom!’

The ground shook violently as a looming figure appeared in his line of sight, then another, and another…

Eren had only ever heard rumors of how titans looked. He knew they were terrifying, but their grotesque wide smiles had been widely underplayed. Some looked almost human if not for their disproportionate and uncanny figures. As he reached his mom, he came to fully understand the gravity of the situation. Beams had broken her legs which meant even if he could get her out of the rubble, she would need his assistance to walk let alone run.

The titans quickly reached his street and with a couple more steps they would reach him. One in particular with short blonde hair and a nauseating smile started down his street while staring down at him.

‘Come on!’ Eren pulled on the roof on top of his mom. ‘Anyone?! Help!’

He looked around for any military police close enough to help but all he saw was absolute chaos. All those fit enough to help were frantically running away in the opposite direction of the titans while some were crushed as though they were merely ants. Eren didn’t stop his tries at pulling off the lodged wood, putting all his energy into boosting his arms. When his arms were just about to give out, he heard a familiar voice to his right.

‘Carla! Eren! Are you okay?!’ A man with slightly disheveled chestnut hair and circular glasses was rushing to his side. It was his father. He looked as though he was himself in no position to ask about others' wellbeing. His hair was chaotic and tangled, glasses tilted sideways. Faint salmon-colored lines formed indents just under his eye down to his cheek giving him an even a weirdly uncanny exhausted expression.

‘Grisha! The Titans are coming in! Take Eren and run!’

‘No! Father, Help me get mom out. Please!’ Eren pleaded

Grisha seemed to hesitate, an internal battle stopping him from following either command. Their time was limited, the Titan had gone unnoticed by him until it reached the foot of the house, already reaching down for Carla. Eren had never stopped in his struggle to free his mom but it was too late.

‘GO. NOW!’ This was Carla’s dying wish.

Grisha grabbed Eren by the waist but not before catching a glimpse of the titan that now held his wife in their grasp. His eyes widened enough for Eren to notice. He went stiff.

‘…Dina…?’

He didn’t have the chance to think before the titan’s jaw unfastened and teeth bit down into Carla. Her screams drowned everything out. He ran, ran as fast as he could. Grisha knew this would be his final chance to pass his power on. He needed to find a secure place and fast.

Eren watched as she became motionless, her screaming stopping. There was nothing he could do as his hand stayed reaching out to his mom. As he sobbed, he couldn’t help as anger built up inside him. ‘We could have saved her! We could have…’

‘…I will kill them all…. Every last one!’ He muttered through clenched teeth; his voice rose louder at every word. Tears threatened to spill, but Eren held them in to avoid looking weak.

His father ran through the gate that he frequently used to enter past Wall Maria; however, the gate was now nothing more than a titan-sized hole. It had clearly been destroyed with the intention to allow more of the monsters to pass through. Eren grabbed and pushed his father’s shoulder to free himself but his father just proceeded to hold on tighter. He decided struggling would be useless and let himself be carried.

It felt like hours before Grisha finally put him down on the ground, he felt the familiar dirt and grass between his fingertips. He looked around and found he was atop the hill where he frequently took naps. He remembered those warm summer days he would be woken up with the sight of Mikasa looking down at him. The shade she produced was always appreciated, her raven hair giving him the perfect cover for the relentless sun. The tree brought him little comfort now as his father roughly took hold of his shoulders.

‘I didn’t mean to tell you like this Eren, but you need to listen to everything I say’ They spent a moment of silence staring each other in the eyes. Spaced out Eren nodded. Grisha took off a string necklace from around his neck and gently placed it around Eren’s neck. He lifted the hanging key with his fingers and bent down to be at eye level with Eren.

‘Keep that key on you at all times and remember this every time you see it: You must reach the basement’

Before Eren could ask what, he meant Grisha took out a small box from his bag. He placed it on the floor and kneeled as he opened it to reveal a needle-like the ones used at a Doctor’s practice.

‘This injection will cause some memory loss so giving you an explanation now would be useless’ Eren was speechless. Grisha seemed regretful for what he was about to do but too determined for it to influence his actions.

‘Listen well, Recapture Wall Maria and make it to the basement no matter what!’ A tear formed in the corner of his eye and rolled down his cheek. ‘At that time, this power will aid you’ He inched towards Eren as Eren backed away slowly. He gripped Eren’s shoulder and loomed over him with the needle in hand-

‘I’m sure Their memories will teach you how to use it!’ The injection shot pain up Eren’s arm and he felt himself go numb. The injection’s contents traveled throughout his entire body and he started to glow.

‘You’ll learn the truth when you reach the basement. It’ll be a long hard road, but you must reach its end’ Grisha cried, his tears turned to streams. ‘If you want to save Mikasa, Armin, and everyone else, you have got to master this power’

‘Goodbye my son’

Eren felt himself lose consciousness. The last thing he saw was the fear in his father’s eyes.

* * *

Eren’s eyes fluttered open, he could see the sun through the thick canopy up above. He looked around and noticed he was alone atop a hill overlooking a massive wall. The wall spanned the entire horizon and he could faintly make out what looked to be a sizable hole. The edges looked sharp and sloppy as though it had been broken and not built to be that way. He wasn’t familiar with the large expanse of uninhabited green however the tree he was looking at felt oddly familiar. He searched his memories for an explanation and found not only no explanation for what he was doing sleeping on a secluded hill but no memories as to who _he was_ and in general.

The ground was lightly shaking and as he stood up and looked across the edge of the hill towards the littered buildings just outside the wall giving, he noticed some figures peaking over the houses and farms. A few dozen were lazily heading in his general direction having probably sensed him, but he paid no mind. There was no way they could spot him from so far away.

At the twist of his neck, he felt the pressure of an object hitting his Chest and looked down. A key was hanging from a string. He gently lifted it and examined the diamond-shaped handle and golden exterior. It felt familiar but he could not recall where he’s seen it. All he knew is that it felt important.

Eren noticed to his right that a house-sized titan, the smallest of the group began sprinting in Eren’s direction as though he had spotted him from such a distance. That couldn’t be, right? Eren had nowhere to go. He contemplated climbing the tree but that would hardly reach the titan’s shoulder allowing it even better access to grabbing him without much effort.

The titan approached fast, giving Eren no time to think. Almost by instinct he brought his hand to his mouth and bit into it _hard._ As he broke skin, he felt himself stretch and grow taller. His body was forming a cocoon around itself. The feeling was uncomfortable but the sudden warmth he was enveloped by made his eyes feel heavy with sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I kind of wanted Grisha to pull a Hannes S1 Ep1 so I wrote it. I hope you enjoyed the chapter!
> 
> Also, I just made an AOT-themed discord with my friend and I love to talk to new people so feel free to join!!  
> Discord link: https://discord.gg/fhdknVZvA7


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was told that my discord link at the end of the last chapter wasn’t active anymore, so I updated it.   
> If you are confused by this chapter, I explain it in the end Notes. 
> 
> I hope you enjoy :)

Eren woke up completely surrounded by a heavy knit blanket which kept his limbs both constrained and warm. He opened his eyes before closing them once more to let a tear travel down his cheek. Memories from a hyper-realistic dream he had woken from began disappearing from his mind, but the emotions of distress lingered. It was as though he had just experienced something heart-breaking. Eren breathed in deeply and clutched the warm sides of the blanket tighter.

As he relaxed his eyes shifted open once more, glancing around the room. His mom could be seen, back facing him, doing what he assumed were the dishes. He sighed and rearranged himself inside the blanket surrounding him so as to press his back against the window. The soft-touch of the blanket against his face made him want to drift back off to sleep. The darkness the back of his eyelids offered brought him peace. 

His mind drifted off, conjuring up once more the grotesque silhouettes of giants roaming his street. Eren attributed the weird image to simply his mind recreating images from Armin’s books. He felt almost like he was there, facing the titans himself. His perspective changed from looking up to the monsters to looking down almost as though he himself had become one of them.

‘Eren, can you help me dry the dishes?’ his mom's soft voice cut through the silence. 

‘Mhm’ Eren responded unmoving, not yet ready to leave his cocoon.

‘I might let you out to play with Mikasa and Armin if you help me’ she tempted. Eren sat up straight and untangled himself to walk over to his mom.

‘I don’t get why I can't already be with them. I was going to meet Armin by the river...’

‘I grounded you because the military police have better things to do than break up your fights all the time, and so does Mikasa’ Eren picked up the damp towel and pressed it against the damp edge of a chipped plate.

‘They were bullying Armin again and even took his food this time’ Eren countered, frustrated.

‘I know Eren but let Hannes deal with it. Mikasa always ends up in trouble when she helps you… For her sake avoid fighting please?’

‘He’s nothing but a drunk! They all are! The military doesn’t even care about fights until it stops entertaining them, how can I rely on him when he’s not even sober enough to remember what his only job is?!’ Eren had had enough. He wanted to be outside with Mikasa and Armin, running around the street freely. And if anything, now of all times he wished he could go out and vent his frustrations. 

‘If you help me with the laundry and promise me you won’t fight or cause a scene, I’ll let you out during teatime okay?’ His mother placed the last cup down on the now soaked towel and waited for Eren to finish drying it.

After Carla found Eren’s promise satisfactory they both headed outside to climb the stairs and put up the laundry. With the clothes in hand, she began pinning the shirts to the thin wire. The wind blew the cloth gently, letting it sway. The sky was a beautiful blue. Clouds were littered randomly. Eren could not take his eyes off the view, he felt as though all was too peaceful. Almost too silent. 

He picked up one of the bedsheets and held it up above his head to allow his mom to pin it to the end of the wire. He was forced to stand on his toes to allow for the cloth to reach.

A throbbing pain suddenly hit the side of his face. Similar to the pain he got from fistfights he had long become familiar with except this time no one had hit him. He scanned the area but just he and his mom were around. The pain lessened and then hit hard again. He tightly shut his eyes, brought his arms to his face, letting go of the bedsheet, and crouched to avoid any more hits.

Carla had not noticed his weird behavior continued on and began placing shirts on the line and flattening them to help the drying process.

The ground under Eren began to shake but only he seemed affected. The pounding headache didn’t let up and he could have sworn that when he squinted his eyes opened the world around him looked different. The sky was a little duller and the houses he seemed to now be towering, even while crouching, were almost completely destroyed. He lifted his arms and looked forward at the titan swarming him with punches. He formed a fist with his hand and aimed for the figure in front of him. 

Before the fist connected to the face, his mother called out to him.

‘Eren stop playing around, help me with the last shirt and I’ll let you play with Mikasa and Armin’

He blinked and found himself on the floor with his arm stretched out toward… nothing. He made no effort to move still lost in the vivid dream he had just had. This was the second time that day he had seen the dream without even falling asleep. It surpassed simple daydreaming. Deciding to just forget about it until he could ask Armin about it, he sat up and helped his mom.

* * *

Eren ran down the street, past the various food vendors chatting to customers at their stands, past the alcoholic guards he knew would be no help in a real emergency and onto the smaller path that led to the edge of the river. Armin was already sitting on the grass on the water’s edge, with a thick book in hand. Mikasa was sat next to him looking over his shoulder towards the picture in the book. A pile of wood she had collected for chores had scattered across the ground next to her.

‘Armin, Mikasa’

They both turned around to face Eren. Mikasa swiftly stood up and went to Eren while Armin stayed sat down and smiled.

‘I thought you were grounded for today?’ They were both clearly confused however their joy bled through.

‘Mom let me leave once I finished helping her with chores’

Mikasa hugged him and whispered ‘Stop fighting okay? Please. Mom is worried about you.’

‘If I don’t fight then who will?’

She sighed and then sat down with Eren in the center of the trio. He placed his hands behind him, propping himself up. If Eren wanted to talk about his weird visions to Mikasa and Armin, he knew now would be the time, so he started. He explained to them his dreams. He felt stupid for even entertaining the thought there might be more to them than simple illusion however they felt too real. His skin crawled at the image of the grotesque smile of the titan that kept invading his thoughts. He felt faint throbbing pains around his body and he just couldn’t explain them.

‘Eren it’s just a dream’

‘You must have fought so much your brain is turning the bullies into titans’ Mikasa said in absolute seriousness ‘Maybe this is a sign you should just stop fighting’

‘Mikasa I don’t fight because I want to and anyway how else can I explain the pains and visions I’ve been having all day? They’re way to realistic to be just dreams. I know I’m not crazy!’

‘What else can they be Eren? Are you suggesting you saw titans, became one, and fought one _without anyone seeing you_?’

‘I don’t know’

Thick silence surrounded them. Armin took out his book after a couple of minutes and all three abandoned the awkward atmosphere for one of awe. They looked through the book. Armin explained his dream to see the sea someday and Eren talked about how trapped he felt inside the walls. They talked the rest of the afternoon away, theorizing potential ways to get to the sea and debating whether the sea even existed. Armin won due to his sheer passion and Eren couldn’t even bring himself to mind. He loved seeing Armin so happy.

The setting sun was beautiful. As the sun dipped below the horizon, the fleeting colors of dusk began to fade away. The blades of grass gained an orange tint before darkening to pine as the sun disappeared from view.

All three stood up, aware of their need to return home. Eren noted that the streets were quieter than usual. The vendors had returned home, the boxes where the soldiers usually sat were empty. It was unusual but neither Armin nor Mikasa mentioned it, continuing their conversation as normal.

‘Why won’t you just join the Military Police? You can help people without worrying mom!’

‘That’s no worse than living like a caged animal Mikasa! Eating, Sleeping, and drinking aren’t living its _surviving…_ I don’t just want to survive, I want to discover the outside world, run free. I’ll kill all the titans if that’s what it takes!’

‘Most people don’t return from the outside. You never win against the bullies Eren. How do you expect to win against titans, passion alone isn’t going to work.’

‘Armin you think he’s being stupid too right? Help me knock some sense into Eren’ Mikasa pleaded. This argument was not the first of its kind and wouldn’t be the last. She doubted anything she’d say would change his mind.

‘I don’t think Eren is entirely wrong Mikasa… When those bullies called me a heretic and punched me for wanting to go outside, it didn’t change my mind. Nothing has happened in 100 years but that doesn’t mean nothing ever will. I don’t want to die inside these walls. I want to see the birds, the ocean, a landscape _free of walls.’_ Armin smiled at the thought of leaving like his parents frequently did. Running his hands through the crystal blue water, his hair flowing in the wind. The overwhelming smell of salt and sounds of birds flying overhead invaded his mind.

Mikasa puffed in frustration.

They continued down the road until the ground began shaking again. Eren stopped moving and attempted to stabilize himself. Mikasa and Armin once more acted as though nothing was wrong other than Eren’s reaction. Mikasa ran to his side and put her hand on his shoulder out of concern. Eren looked around and already feared returning to the apocalyptic state of Shinganshina he had been dreaming of all day.

The headaches returned, the trembling never left, and his vision became blurry. Through the slits of his eyes, he saw multiple figures walking towards him.

‘Stand back!’ He shouted closing his eyes and put up his arms in defense. Had the headaches not blurred his vision he would have fought the figures surrounding him, but his senses were completely overwhelmed.

Eren’s eyes opened, ready to fight back against the bully but the view he was met with was not of a child but of a giant he had been dreaming of all day. He felt lost and stumbled backward against a house as a huge first hurtled towards him. A strangled scream came out of his throat, loud and fierce. It was strange to his ears. He could no longer understand what was real. What he had thought of as reality drifted off and blended with the current timeline. Only vague images of colors and emotions stayed. His memories drifted off until only blurry images remained. He could tell he felt affection for the children in the dream but could no longer remember their connection or even appearance. The fighting became harsher. He threw random punches, angry at himself and the titans now surrounding him.

An unknown female voice echoed in his head: _You never win against the bullies, Eren_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a dream sequence he is having while fighting titans, it is based on a mixture of his memories with a slight alteration. It is similar to S1 EP12 when Armin is trying to remove Eren from his titan except here when he wakes up, he has no memories. I take a lot of inspiration from canonical scenes. Also, I need more Eren Jaeger & Mikasa Ackerman & Armin Arlert friendship because I miss it so I’m writing it.
> 
> At the end of the chapter the bullies are meant to somewhat meld with the titans he is fighting outside his dream sequence  
> Hope you enjoyed this chapter; the next chapter is a Mikasa/Armin Trost PoV.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mikasa/Armin PoV chapter
> 
> I hope you enjoy! :)

The crowd was overwhelming and Mikasa’s head was pounding. She squeezed the smaller hand in hers and continued pushing through the anxious people. They had only been here for a couple of hours and she already wanted to return home. She pulled her scarf tighter around her neck for comfort. This was the second time she lost her family. She felt emotionless, in a darker and less functional way. As though all the emotions she had once been able to feel drained out of her with the hope that she’d ever see Eren again. She had to be strong for Armin, but he still had his family. His grandfather was still there to support him. She on the other hand had no one.

Armin called out for her, but she didn’t notice, dead set on getting food and _surviving_ instead of _living_ on for Eren as she had before. He let go of her hand hoping to raise any sort of reaction from her, but she walked off, her hand aimlessly grasping the air.

She made it a couple of feet before squeezing Armin’s hand however she simply ended up forming a fist due to Armin's absence. She stopped and turned her head sharply. The look in her eyes was of pure fear. She looked around actively, eyes widening when her eyes reached Armin’s. Armin hadn’t realized how much the attack on Shinganshina had affected her. He hadn’t yet processed the lack of Eren’s presence himself and couldn’t even begin to imagine how Mikasa must have felt about it.

It felt as though a massive hole lay open in his heart and he didn’t know how to close it. However, Armin refused to pronounce Eren dead. Eren may have never been the strongest but in terms of determination, he towered above others.

Mikasa slowly walked back towards him and hesitantly took hold of his hand again dragging him towards the line for food. The area lay bare of any joy, just murmurs between those who hadn’t seen the Titans and those who spun tales of the horrors they saw.

Trost military spoke loudly of their discontent towards sharing the low supply the town had kept for emergencies.

‘Why to waste food on all these peasants’ one exclaimed, clearly wanting others around to hear. ‘We can hardly feed ourselves let alone give out free food to the elderly and kids that can’t contribute anything’

Mikasa could do nothing more than glare and push past them knowing a fight would only cause them both more trouble.

They quickly reached the back of the line. It was slow but allowed them to look around clearly. Most of those around were either in their late 30s or elderly. The only people their age that they saw were a trio of two blond kids, a girl, and a guy, and a taller lanky brown-haired boy but Mikasa quickly lost them in the crowd as she didn’t care to pay too much attention and look out for them.

* * *

Annie stood behind the two taller boys in front of her. There was a thick silence between them as they looked for a secluded place to talk. Somewhere where no one would or could overhear them. They looked around at the bustling crowd, the drastic difference from Marley was almost too much a distraction. The crowd pushed them around and gave very little space for them to go through but once they shoved past a group of elderly, they found a clearing hidden behind a set of closed stores and huddled together.

‘What should we do now?’ Reiner broke the silence. He had faint dented lines going down his cheeks from under his eyes.

‘It’s up to you Reiner’

The look of disdain in Annie’s eyes was clearly visible. She crossed her arms. ‘ _You’re_ the one that insisted we continue this mission even after Marcel was eaten’, she hadn’t liked Reiner before, and her opinion had only gone down since they set off. She could understand that if they returned without anything, they wouldn’t be left alive for long, at most a couple of days until the next warrior candidates were chosen but Reiner was the cause of Marcel’s death and he had been the tactician. With no one to fill the role, Reiner stepped up. It was no secret however that he didn’t become the Armored Titan due to skill. She couldn’t and _wouldn’t_ entrust her survival to him.

‘Annie calm down, we don’t need to be friends, but we do need to work together’ Berthold said, uncomfortable with the mediator role he was forced into. He looked at Annie. Her blonde hair was tied up in a messy bun that had gotten even messier in the journey to Trost. They weren’t really friends before Marcel died but now, they seemed more like enemies than comrades.

‘Look, the only way we can go home is with the Founder Titan which the king is in control of currently’ Reiner sighed, frustrated. ‘The king lives in wall Sina and the only way inside is through the Military so we should join the trainees as soon as we can’

‘I’ll go around the talk to people, see if I can find any clues about titans. Annie, you go sneak around and figure out how advanced their technology is here. We can’t be sure Marley gave us accurate information. And Bert you should—’

‘I’ll just observe people from the side and try and find good meeting places for us to make plans and train’ Berthold interjected

‘We need to get as little attention as possible while continuing to train otherwise we’ll fall back on fitness’ Bert looked around, still not used to the new environment. ‘Get some food, we’ll need energy’

‘Fine, but until then keep out of my way’ Annie walked away and back towards the crowd to go get herself some food.

* * *

Once they reached the front of the line, Mikasa and Armin were handed two pieces of stale bread and went to sit under the arc of the nearby building. The one-meter wall was perfect to sit down on but took some effort on Armin’s part to climb. After help from Mikasa, they sat in silence and chewed away at the rock-hard loaf that would constitute their day’s meal. There wasn’t much to say.

The silence continued for a couple more minutes as Armin tried to think of a topic of conversation that didn’t include Eren.

‘What do we do now?’

‘Survive, Armin, there’s nothing else we can do’

Armin could not stay silent about Eren any longer. ‘I don’t think he’s dead’. The silence that followed lay heavy in the air. Mikasa froze.

‘…What?’

‘I don’t think he’s dead. You know him as well as I do and I can’t see him being eaten by a Titan, that’s not the way he’d die I just know it’ Armin insisted. ‘No-one can convince me he’s dead until I see his body with my own two eyes’.

Mikasa was still and mute, thinking over his words with such intensity that Armin decided it best to wait for her to speak first before continuing. ‘Do you really think there’s a chance he’s still in Shinganshina? Even with all the titans, we saw walking around?’ Her words came out as careful whispers.

‘If it’s Eren yes. We haven’t been able to find Grisha and Carla either, maybe they all found a safe space’

‘We need to find him! If he’s there he’ll need our help!’ Mikasa stood up and looked around aimlessly as though she was looking for a plan. ‘We could get past the guards and then force them to open the gate and then steal a horse and ride to the wall and then…!’

She was fumbling for words, her words coming out faster than her thoughts could form.

‘Mikasa we both know that won’t work’

‘But how then?’

‘I can only think of 3 scenarios of Eren’s current conditions; He is either dead…’ Mikasa began protesting at that thought ‘ _or_ alive but that would mean either he is still in Shinganshina or he is here in Trost and we just haven’t found him yet’ They returned to silence for a minute to think over which scenario they hated least.

‘It can’t be the last one’ Mikasa murmured, ‘we looked everywhere and Eren isn’t the type to hide’. Armin hummed in response. ‘That’s true’.

‘I’m going to join the survey corps to return to Shinganshina’ Armin stated matter-of-factly. Mikasa, still standing, turned towards him and stepped forward. ‘You’re what?! Not you too… Armin, the sea might not even exist, don’t to sacrifice your life for—’

‘It’s not just about the sea anymore Mikasa’

‘We don’t know where Eren is, let alone if he’s even alive! I can’t sit behind these walls and hope that he’ll magically appear in front of us one day or that titans won’t barge through this wall like they did Maria!’

‘You don’t have to come with, but I need to find him’

It was clear Armin was unyielding in his plan. Mikasa sat back down and put her head on Armin’s shoulder. ‘I don’t want to lose you too…’ They sat speechlessly, listening to the crowd around them, the bread long abandoned in their hands. The air was warm, but the wind sent shivers down Mikasa’s spine. 

For a long while, neither spoke until Mikasa opened her mouth.

‘Okay’ Mikasa said with newfound determination, her mind was set, ‘I will join the Survey Corps with you’.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am currently at the beginning of the practice-exam season so I haven't had time to write more than 2k per chapter but once it's over I will be making the chapters longer.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is another short chapter but once my exam season is over (in a week) I'll start putting out longer chapters. I have no beta so if you spot any errors I will make sure to fix them. Thank you and hope you enjoy! :)

He brought his hand up to cover his nape while shaking his leg free of the 4-meter titan wrapped around it. His free hand reached out in the form of a fist, hitting one of the 10-meter titans' squares in the cheek. It went flying backward into one of the broken-down houses below. Eren tried to free himself long enough to jog back towards the familiar tree however the titans had him cornered against multiple farmhouses. He couldn’t break free through just force. He looked around to see how many titans were surrounding him. There were two smaller titans around his legs, attempting to climb, two that almost reached his height and a 15-meter one that faced him head-on. The monster’s grotesque smile grew wider as he successfully lunged forward and griped one of Eren’s shoulders.

Eren was forced to remove the hand covering his nape to free himself but the titan took advantage and leaned forward to bite him. Eren swerved to the left and kicked off one of the smaller titans to allow himself to sweep the taller titan off his feet. It barely worked forcing them both down to the ground. He used the titan now towering over him as a shield as he rolled over got up to run. A slightly shorter titan grabbed onto his arm but Eren shrugged him off with such force the arm was torn off.

He ran for it, looking back occasionally to see that the titans were still chasing him. He followed parallel to the wall as it gave him a strange sense of security. After what felt like hours, he finally saw a forest on the horizon. It got larger and larger until he found himself completely towered by trees. Eren felt himself tire out and seeing as the titans were still chasing him, he knew he’d have to find a way to escape.

The only logical solution he could think of was to climb a tree. Eren wasn’t sure it could or even would hold his weight, but he was too tired to continue fighting. As his hand reached the first branch his exhaustion reached him. He could no longer move. The heat enveloped him and just as he was about to close his eyes, he felt steam hit his face followed by a flash of fresh air. His hand was released easily from the cocoon and he managed to break through the nape. Once freed Eren weakly climbed his way up the arm until he reached the branch. It was much larger than it seemed as a Titan.

All this felt completely unnatural to Eren. He couldn’t seem to remember anything and the harder he tried the worse his headache got. Segments of memories came back, but they were either too vague or distorted to put together. Worse of all he couldn’t tell where he was.

The large branch was enough to accommodate his size perfectly. He looked down multiple pairs of huge eyes stared back. The Titans were ready to attack him the moment he was within their reach. He was hoping they’d get bored of this chase and decide on leaving.

The oak tree he sat on seemed to measure a couple of dozen meters seeming as he felt short even in his titan form. Eren sighed and lay back on the branch. His arm came to cover his eyes to avoid the stream of sunlight threatening to make his headache worse. The sun kept him warm as he fought not to doze off.

Why had the titans fought him? Eren just couldn’t understand. He hadn’t been sure he too was a titan until he saw the corpse, he had walked out of, but they weren’t attacking each other so why just him?

The sun was setting. Oranges mixed with crimson reflected off the key lying flat against his chest and the sun disappeared beneath the horizon. This is when he noticed something strange. For the first time in hours, the titans had stopped moving. Completely stopped. He peered over the edge of the tree to make sure but saw absolutely no movement.

To test whether they were simply still to trick him into leaving he used all his force to pry his titan corpse off the tree and have it land on the titans below. After a few exhausting attempts, the large hand finally slipped free and tumbled to the ground. Eren watched attentively as the large figure landed directly on top of the 15-meter titan that had been sitting against the tree. He readied himself for an aggressive response but there was just silence. He was too tired to even begin to try and understand why they suddenly stopped moving. Maybe they had fallen asleep, he thought. But that thought quickly disappeared as he remembered that they weren’t human. By now the sun had fully disappeared and the Moon glowed through the thick foliage.

Eren didn’t fully trust that they would stay immobile, but he was getting hungry and had no choice but to leave the safety of the tree to survive. He looked around his surroundings and spotted some movement in the bushes. Squinting his eyes helped him see a small deer hiding amongst a pile of leaves. More so than hiding, it was eating berries off the bushes while shaking its head softly to avoid the swarm of flies that followed the scene of fruits.

He needed a way to get down from the tree. He couldn’t climb down and jump down would only lead to his death. He thought hard for different options, but his brain was empty of everything but common sense it seemed. The energy he used up for outrunning the titan drained him and he wasn’t sure he’d even be able to turn back into a titan to climb down.

Eren realized he had nothing to lose trying and bit down hard on his hand. The motion felt instinctual and not learned. For a moment he thought nothing would happen and he’d be forced to starve down without ever even knowing who he was however a sudden flash of gold ended his thoughts in an instant. He felt taller and his view was of significantly higher standing.

Eren had made a small miscalculation. With height and size came a footing imbalance on the tree that had him falling to the ground the moment the transformation was finalized. He reached out towards the trunk and attempted to dig his nails into the tree but to no avail. He fell flat on the titans that had stayed motionless at the foot of the tree. He lay there for a couple of minutes to try end regain his composure.

Once he was upstanding again, he walked over to where he last spotted the deer. The deer was surprisingly still there munching away at the fruit. Eren was shocked, expecting the animal to have run off the second he heard the impact of the titan’s fall. It was clear that as the titans mostly left the wildlife alone there were few predators for them to fear. He picked up a couple of bushes around the area hoping they’d have enough berries to sustain him. Due to the loss of food the deer lost interest and began walking away. Eren followed assuming it was walking towards a drinking source.

A couple of paces further he noticed a pond. The deer was already at the edge drinking from the slightly murky water. Eren figured now would be the time to shift back to human. He pulled at his arm and freed himself before climbing out. The moss covering the ground was soft and felt cool to the touch. Eren fell to his knees at the edge of the water and cupped his hands full of water before gulping it down. He had just gone more than a day without any water and almost longer without food. To his left was a huge pile of bushes and he searched through them for fruit. He found a total of 23 berries and although he was unsure of whether they were even edible he threw them all into his mouth and chewed a couple of times before swallowing. His stomach wasn’t satisfied but for now, it’d have to do.

He lay back on the grass and just stared at the sky. The stars were mostly hidden by the trees, but it felt as though he was staring straight into a void of nothing. The moon was hidden but he knew it was there, illuminating the night.

After a day of action, he was left alone once again. He had been given no time to think before being thrown into action. His identity felt like the least of his issues but that didn’t helpfully curb his curiosity. He may have lost his memories, but he knew humans didn’t normally turn into titans. He had vague memories, but nothing concretes enough to build an image. When he closed his eyes all that popped up was a mix of the colors red, gold, and the feeling of a blanket wrapped soundly around him. After the long day, he had just faced, his eyes drooped heavily with sleep.

His last thoughts before drifting off were the hope that he’d survive long enough to make sense of his lost memories. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter will have a couple of days/ weeks of time skips with Eren learning to survive by himself.
> 
> I do read all the comments so feel free to leave some!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I struggled with work this week so it took me 2 weeks instead of 1 to update this chapter but I made this one slightly longer to make up for it. I will be continuing with my 1 chapter a week cycle from this chapter on.
> 
> Enjoy :)

Sunlight hit Eren’s face, blinding him even through his eyelids. The longer he pretended to stay asleep the worse his headache grew. He rolled to his side hoping to alleviate the heat the rays were creating. 

The blinding white heat, much to his relief, suddenly disappeared however at the same time so did the light. It was as though something was obstructing his face. 

A puff of air hit his face and his ear picked up on the sound of nearby rustling. Something wet and cold hit his cheek and he sprung up, shocked. Cracking his eyes open, a deer appeared in front of him. It cocked its head to the side and looked to its right where a fawn stood innocently. 

Eren groaned. He hadn’t meant to fall asleep but here he was, next to the water mid-day. After a quick glance around he noted that there were no titans around but that didn’t mean safety. He needed a plan. Berries wouldn’t be able to sustain himself indefinitely after all. For now, the pond would do in terms of a water source, but he needed meat. Eren wished he had his memories but even then, it was unlikely his past self knew much about survival in the woods. He sighed and slumped further back onto the floor. His main goal today would be to figure out how to get himself some meat.

A Rustling from beside him reminded him of the deers’ presence. They hadn’t left yet and were busy grazing on the leftovers of the berry bushes. Eren found it strange that they didn’t seem to fear him, but he had established that they weren’t scared of approaching titans, so he guessed it made sense.

It was likely that the deer would be the only potential source of meat around, and so, with it being the most sensible solution he hatched a plan to kill one.

The forest looked darker from the ground than it did in the tree. The forest floor was still due to the lack of wind with the exception of the occasional vegetal shuffle caused by the deer. Meanwhile up tops in the trees above, leaves and branches rocked and swayed precariously. The silence amplified every sound, from the chirping of crickets to the soft rustling of leaves. 

An abnormal pounding to the ground released Eren from the haze he was in. From behind a tree, he spotted one of the titans that had been waiting at the foot of the tree the previous night. It appeared small, towered by the trees but Eren knew that if he were back in his titan form, he would only be a few meters taller. In his current form, he wouldn’t even have a fighting chance.

He got far away enough for the titan not to notice his titan shifting but close enough not to forget the location of the pond. Using his large frame, he climbed up the tree and turned back to sit on the branch back in human form. He formed a plan, going back and forth between the idea of trapping the deer as a human or simply easing his task and working as a titan. Due to his small frame and complete lack of knowledge on hunting, the titan-form mission idea won. The only downside was that he’d be a larger target for the titans to spot and attack. Night-time would be the only time he’d be able to safely carry out this hunt.

He waited until the sun dipped past the horizon before jumping off the tree and biting his hand. A flash surrounded him, lighting up the surrounding area and he felt his feet land on the ground. The impact created a rush of wind and Eren feared that the titans would be woken up. 

Although he hadn’t seen any titans roam at night, he couldn’t say with absolute certainty that none would wake up. The wind disappeared and so did any and all noise, indicating to Eren that if something were awake at this time it couldn’t be a titan. Retracing his steps, he emerged past some trees into the clearing where the pond was, surrounded by a family of deer. If his plan was to be a success, he knew he’d have to act fast and not frighten the animals. Muscles tightened as he crouched to appear less intimidating, although he still stood a couple of meters taller than them. 

They grazed on the plants bordering the pond unaware of the giant danger behind them, from behind one of the fawns, a large hand reached down and picked it up from underneath. Eren was at a loss of what to do now that he had the animal in hand. Even without memories, he knew this wasn’t something he was used to. The deer struggled in his hand, attempting to become a dead weight to throw him off. When this proved unsuccessful it writhed furiously trying to free itself. Its legs hitting his hand repeatedly. The fur tickled his hand as he considered just letting it roam free and sticking to a plant-based diet, but he knew he wouldn’t be able to sustain his titan form or fight without energy. 

Increasing the pressure in his hand he closed his eyes and mentally apologized to the animal. After the pressure had caused it to fall limp, he walked back towards the tree he had become accustomed to and placed the lifeless body at the foot of it. It didn’t seem far-fetched to assume that the titans would leave it alone considering their disinterest in all non-human beings.

Staying up in the branches was beginning to take a toll on Eren. He remembered that when he left his titan form, the body stayed behind for a while before disintegrating. Making up his mind, he decided to set up camp on the ground for the evening. One hand gripped the left side of the trunk while the other lay flat on the ground. He brought his right knee to his elbow to create a sort of wall around the deer. This was to be turned into an enclosed fireplace. Once Eren was satisfied with the position he pulled himself out and went to collect the materials he needed for the fire. Some sharp rocks and sticks would suffice; he convinced himself.

The moon shone brightly through the cracks of the trees above. As the stars in the sky mesmerized him, getting lost in the unknown of the void allowed him to feel peace for the first time in days. Every passing moment had been a struggle for his life, and he was forced to live on the edge, avoiding the imminent death he was confronted with constantly. There was nothing he could do other than focus on surviving for _right now_ instead of on an uncertain future.

He broke off bark from trees to add to the intensity of the fire and picked up flat rocks. His thumb slid across the edge of the sharp rock ensuring it would slice the meat thinly, dropping those that felt too blunt. The cuts on his fingers steamed up and healed as quickly as they were created but he didn’t pay it any attention. Had this been a normal forest, he would have looked for sticks, but this was no normal forest and even in his titan form he would be unable to break off the branches that spanned the width of his entire self. 

Collecting wood felt natural to him, as though this had been a daily event in his life previous to his loss of memories. The rough texture of wood incited images of someone, he supposed an important person from his past, scolding him. A feeling of fondness and nostalgia poured over him. He sat against the trunk of a tree at the foot of the path to pause his search momentarily. The wind was weak but enough to blow stray hairs out of his face. He breathed in and out, calming himself. He could feel the pressure of the rocks below him, the rough of the bark digging into his back, the soft moss against his hand. A sigh escaped him, and he closed his eyes breathing in deeply before getting back up.

It would soon be dusk, and he needed to start the fire and get the meat cooking somehow.

The fire took a few tries to start. Luckily a few of the rocks he picked up happened to be flint and muscle memory allowed for him to make a spark relatively quickly. The smoke of the fire merged with the steam coming from the titan he used as a shelter. He knew that this was far from a permanent solution but with how wide the branches were in the trees above, Eren was keenly aware that he could only cook at the foot of the tree. 

While adding more bark to the fire he burned himself. Rushing back from the heat he looked at his arm, but it was already nearly healed. He hadn’t paid much attention to how fast his healing had been previously for cuts and blisters, but this felt fast… faster than should be possible. Reminding himself that his shock was likely due to his amnesia he chose to normalize it. 

Now equipped with the tools he needed he got to skinning the animal. Soon he had cut up strands, and with his hands, he pressed down in an attempt to drain out some of the blood. Now that he knew that his healing could quickly reverse any damage to himself, he placed some of the thin rocks he hadn’t used on the fire and waited for them to heat up. Once the sun began to rise over the horizon, he picked up the rocks, badly scorching himself in the process, and put them in a tight circle on the side. The meat once placed on the rocks began sizzling. Eren used the time it took for the meat to cook, to heal his hands. A dozen minutes later, the meat was no longer red, and the rocks were cooled. 

Repeating the process, by the time the fire fizzled out he had eaten a fifth of the deer and felt as if he had regained enough energy to transform again. He walked out further into the clearing and bit his hand, blood filling his mouth. The transformation felt smoother now that he had food in him. Sleep that night came easier.

* * *

It had been a month or two since he first entered the forest. Sleep had been elusive and rare and made even harder since he discovered the inactivity of titans during the night. Sleeping during the day had proved difficult due to the heat and sun and although he had gotten at most a few hours of rest during sunset and sunrise, it was scarce. 

Eren had gotten better at using his titan abilities, even discovering a few new ones along the way. After a bit of trial and error, he managed to keep his titan form intact for up to twelve hours even when he separated himself from it. This was all thanks to his discovering his hardening ability. He wasn’t sure what to call it and certainly didn’t know the extent of its strength but after testing it out he was able to harden his body enough to protect against titans.

Three titans appeared from behind the trees in the distance and stumbled towards Eren with purpose. He had gotten used to the constant stream of them coming, although recently he had to travel further through the woods and sometimes even venture outside to find some to practice his abilities against. He focused his impact on his fist as he lunged forwards towards the larger of the three. His knuckles hooked into its jaw which sent it flying against one of the trees with a large thud, head hung low and dazed. Eren waited for a second for a reaction before turning his attention to the smaller one clawing at his thigh. The larger one was behind a couple of trunks, observing him, clearly unnerved. 

Eren climbed up a tree, shaking off the 5-meter titan in the process. He dug his right hand into the bark, stumbling slightly, and then leaped onto another tree and then another. He needed to lead these titans away from his home base. The smaller one sprinted while the taller one fumbled slowly across the forest bed. Its longer legs allowed him to keep close to Eren regardless of its slow speed due to its huge strides. 

Quickly deciding the best form of action, Eren devised a plan mid-jump. Abandoning his titan form momentarily, once he reached the top of the tree he looked down to see the two other titans devouring his fast decomposing corpse. Feet left the branch in a hurry and blood ran down his wrist as he bit down hard. The flash alerted the titans below that something was going on but by then it was too late. Eren had not only found new skills but improved his stamina and worked on his transformation. After weeks of exhaustion, he could now transform up to 3 times in a day with no strain. 

Both titans lay lifeless, their napes having been attacked viscously. It was still bright out and with nothing better to do Eren went hunting for more food. He still had a week’s worth of meat left but finding new animals to hunt was becoming harder either due to change in the season or the presence of new predators scaring them away. The deer had caught on that they were no longer the top of the food chain and had now adapted to fear him.

Another week went by and with no visible opponents and complete boredom overwhelming him, he ventured out of the woods and walked back out the way he had come in months before. However, this time he headed north instead of the south where he had first awoken. He hoped that he’d be able to find something to entertain himself with. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter will be a one-year time skip Trost pov, chapters 1-5 had the purpose of setting the base of the plot but now the story will pick up a bit. Levi will finally be appearing soon :D


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter was supposed to be twice as long but my computer decided to bug out and deleted the entire chapter last night leaving me with nothing to post so I will post the first half of the chapter I rewrote today and the second half on either Wednesday or Thursday.
> 
> Enjoy Nonetheless!

Reiner sat uncomfortably in the corner of the barn on a haystack. The musty barn was the best place they had found to train and talk away from the prying eyes of those living in the countryside. Bert had scouted the area out for a couple of weeks before determining that it was abandoned. Occasionally a few children from the neighboring village would wander in, thinking the place to be a perfect hiding spot, just to end up seeing the trio huddled in a dark corner. Annie’s glare was usually enough to have them sprinting out to tell their friends. The three sat in silence, with Reiner sitting down in the center, Bertolt stood to his left, and to his right, Annie leaned cross-armed against the rusty door frame leading to the back exit of the barn.

‘Have you advanced on figuring out their technology Annie?’ Reiner asked with a strained smile.

Annie’s eyes narrowed at the tone used.

‘I haven’t found anything new since our last meeting. Their technology is nowhere near Marley’s, but from what I see on the garrison soldiers, the technology they have is nothing like what we have. During the few times we’ve seen the scouts leave on missions, it looks like their gear is perfect for killing titans, but I can’t be sure how well it works. For now, it seems like other than the weird gear the scouts have; everything is exactly like what we were told in the report. They still heavily rely on horses and cannons.’

‘Hmm.’ Reiner looked at the ground, barely listening.

‘The current king doesn’t have the founding titan.’

Annie didn’t elaborate, leaving the other two to look shocked, awaiting clarification. Reiner left his haze and looked her in the eyes, waiting for clarification.

‘What do you mean?’ Bertolt asked in disbelief. They had been looking around for information for the past few months, and this was the first actual update they had.

‘King Fritz is a figure-head, the nobles are running Paradis.’ Annie relayed, slower.

The only concrete fact they had all believed they had was that the King held the founding titan. They hadn’t considered needing to consider the possibility that someone other than him had it.

‘How do you know?’ Reiner sat up slightly.

‘I snuck around the castle and pretended to be a noble’s daughter. Behind one of the big decorated doors, nobles were sitting around a table with the king at the end looking bored—’

Reiner slumped back down, interrupting her before she was done. ‘What does that prove? Getting bored isn’t a crime.’

‘— _AND THEN_ the nobles all turned to the king and yelled at him to at least _act like the king,_ ’ she emphasized.

Silence surrounded them. Reiner was frozen and couldn’t believe they had wasted a year to find out they knew nothing. Now instead of the initial plan of going straight to the kind, they had to _find him._ He puffed out a dry laugh. This was too much for him. He knew, however, that he had no choice to advance forward and lead Annie and Bertolt in Marcel’s place as he promised.

‘We need to find a way to get to a higher position to get more information. We should conscript into the training corps. Next year we’ll meet the minimum age requirement and we can spend the rest of this year finding more information and tightening up our cover story for our childhood.’

Bertolt nodded, and Reiner continued. ‘I overheard a couple of kids our age from the orphanage talking about joining the Military Police. Only the 10-best people from the training corps can join it, and they get to enter Wall-Sina and guard the king. If we join the MPs, then we’ll be able to investigate the founding titan from within the inner walls.’

Another thick silence followed, Bertolt and Annie were deep in thought and trying to process the idea. They had already wasted a year, and if they didn’t start making a set plan soon. All of this would be for nothing.

‘So, we just have to make it to the top 10?’ Bertolt was the first to break the silence.

‘We were the best in Marley; beating a bunch of civilians in what we’ve been training for, for years should be easy.’ Reiner had already made his mind up. With or without the other warriors, he would join the corps. ‘It would also help us blend in.'

‘Would we even be allowed to join without any papers?’ Bertolt asked, skeptical

‘We won’t be the only ones without papers, and anyways with Wall Maria down, they’ll need more soldiers for extra defense, so we just have to come up with a believable backstory.’

‘Why don’t we just use the story that guy a couple of weeks back told us?’ Annie said nonchalantly.

‘…The guy that killed himself?’ Reiner had a pained expression on his face. He wasn’t used to seeing death from so close up. He had been the one to kill thousands back in Shinganshina, but that felt different. He was like a human stepping on an anthill back then, but that day… the day he’d seen that guy hanging from a tree, was the first death he’d seen since being arriving in Trost.

‘Yes, we can just pretend to come from the small village in the southeast, they’ll never fact check us and if we say that everything was destroyed, they’ll just believe us.’

They all agreed to the cover story and spent a few more minutes smoothing out the details.

It had been a couple of months since Bertoldt had found the group of refugees heading to the countryside. They followed, thinking it would be the easiest way to get out of Trost without being suspicious, and it allowed them to blend in more as most people were orphans here. No one asked questions, you shared your story, or you didn’t. They were given a room in a farm-turned orphanage with the condition that Bertolt and Reiner help out with the hard work. Annie was allowed to roam as the workers believed she would only be in the way when it came to heavy lifting. Annie chuckled softly, thinking back on how ironic it was that she was the strongest in combat around Marley, and here she was treated like a weak small girl.

Once there was a lull in the conversation. Annie got up and off the wall. She made her way to the exit, nearly making it out the door before her name was called out.

‘Annie! Where are you going?’ Reiner yelled, confused at her sudden exit.

She sighed and looked back at him. ‘I’m going back. Did you have something else to add?’ Her indifferent expression gave away nothing. Reiner's mouth opened as though he were about to speak his mind, but he decided it best to keep things between them civil.

‘No,’ He muttered through his teeth.

She continued out of the barn, heading back to the place she now had to call home. She wanted to go back to Marley at all costs and keep her promise to her father but knew that going back empty-handed would lead to nothing, but herself face against a wall with a gun pointed to the back of her head. Reiner and Bertolt were trailing behind further discussing the plans, but she had no interest in increasing tensions by joining in.

She continued on her way back to the house, making a list in her mind of things she needed for her next trip to the capital. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed Reiner and Bertolt take a left, likely to go help the lumberjacks.

‘See you later’ Bertolt yelled. Annie turned around slightly and saw his slightly reddened cheeks and raised her hand and flicked it back in a wave motion in response. She decided to attempt to stay on good terms with them for Bertoldt’s sake if not for the mission.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and kudos are appreciated :)
> 
> I do read all the comments and I will make sure to reply to them when I can.  
> See you all in a couple of days.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As promised part two of chapter 6. I won't be able to keep track of the chapter numbers being a little off so for now, this will be honorary chapter 7. It's considerably shorter than all the other chapters but on Monday I'll be posting a full chapter.
> 
> I hope you enjoy and thank you for all the support on the last chapter <3

Mikasa and Armin sat on the steps outside the room they slept in. The narrow passageway allowed for a little sun. They were silent and had been for a couple of minutes since they’d heard the news. Armin’s grandfather was one of the many people enlisted to go on the Wall Maria reclamation expedition outside the walls. It was a mission with one true purpose, and everyone knew that the aim wasn’t to reclaim the wall. It was a suicide mission. His grandfather and 250,000 other citizens, not the fittest, but those that consumed the most were to be sent out to kill all the titans, without adequate equipment to then reclaim the wall. No explanation on how they’d even reclaim it was given, just a single letter delivered to families with the names of those that would be tasked with 'saving humanity’.

‘It’s not fair’, Armin swiped at his damp cheek, clearing away the new tears that were forming. Mikasa sat to his left and rubbed his back trying to hold back her own tears.

‘First it’s Eren, and now my grandfather-’ He hiccupped ‘He’s not going to come back alive’. After the loss of Eren, Armin had grown more attached to his grandfather. He was the only family he had left excluding Mikasa.

‘Maybe the government has a plan, maybe they’ll be given equipment and there’s information about the mission we just don’t know about yet’ Mikasa said increasingly frantic but softly in an attempt to reassure him.

‘My parents disappeared and now my grandfather is being sent away. I don’t want to be left alone Mikasa’ He trembled beneath her as she wrapped herself around him. Tears threatened to spill, and she was left feeling lost. The way she had felt upon losing Eren was resurfacing and she was walking the edge of her sanity. Armin was all she had left, and he seemed so lost.

‘You won’t be alone Ar, you have me’ she hugged tighter, whispering ‘you’ll always have me’

A shivering hand reached from the side and attached itself around Mikasa and the silence returned.

The door to the house was open and from the corner of her eye, Mikasa could see Armin’s grandfather inside preparing for the departure in a week’s time. He had been told to bring a small bag with one change of clothes. Nothing more, nothing less. Mikasa thought back to the day she lost Eren. The chaos in a town she knew so well, the fear in the eyes of the people she had come to be familiar with, and how empty she felt without Eren by her side. She was still holding out hope that he’d ended up with another camp of refugees and that they’d simply missed paths or that by some miracle he was still living in that house in Shinganshina with Grisha and their mother. She wasn’t naïve enough to entertain that thought very often but on those desperate cold nights when she cuddled up close to Armin for warmth, she couldn’t help but remember in fondness the memories of Eren and Carla fighting over some idiotic thing Eren did or said as she firmly held the cup of tea for Grisha to drink while researching in the basement.

She couldn’t shake the feeling that Eren was out there somewhere but the rational side of her knew that was idealistic, too idealistic. When Armin’s sniffling stopped and cold wind on the evening sent chills down her sides, she decided it was time to go back. Armin’s mop of blond hair was just under her chin as he had curled up in her lap a couple minutes beforehand, beginning to drift off. She felt almost guilty waking him up since It’d been long since he’d had a real break. They had spent the past year helping out with daily tasks, planning how they’d look for Eren regardless of if what they’d find was a body or a shell of the passionate boy they’d left behind. She let one tear trail down her cheek before gently picking Armin up into her arms and bringing him inside.

She had to be strong for Armin because he was being strong for her. They hadn’t adapted to the shift from a trio to a duo, but Armin was set in going to the sea to achieve his dream and Eren’s, the dream to be free. She placed Armin down on the bed and wiped away some of the tears still rolling down his cheek. He had visibly calmed down, but she knew that this week would be hard on him. Even she knew this mission was suicidal. If the survey corps came back with dozens of dead during each mission, a giant herd of humans was just a feast for the titans.

* * *

The week had passed fast, faster than Armin had ever wanted it to. The night before the expedition dinner had been very silent, more silent than usual. Armin’s bubbly ramblings about the content of some cheap science book he read was nowhere to be found and instead all three scraped at their food. Convincing Armin to fall asleep when he was convinced that he could stop time if he just didn’t close his eyes was impossible, but he should fell asleep from exhaustion.

Mikasa woke up early the next morning. The sun had yet to even rise. She was greeted by Armin’s grandfather sitting on the edge of the bed, looking fondly at his sleeping grandson.

The atmosphere was thick and overall depressing but the way that he looked at his grandson like he was precious stung at Mikasa’s hurt in a different type of pain. He shook Armin’s shoulder lightly causing him to open his eyes and humming in confusion.

‘Grandfather-?’

Mikasa left to the kitchen, wanting to leave them some time alone for farewells. After eating leftover scraps of bread for breakfast she returned to both her best friend and his grandfather tightly hugging. Armin was sobbing and the old man was clearly doing no better himself save for the lack of wailing coming from him. The sun rose and they all headed for the gate fearing the final farewell.

They stood awkwardly at the entrance not knowing what to say. The senior took off his straw hat to place on Armin’s head. It did little to lift his mood, but the man smiled as naturally as he could as he spoke.

‘I’m with you Armin, always have, always will’. Armin looked up ‘I’ll be back as soon as I can’.

He then turned to Mikasa and ruffled her hair. ‘Take care of him, try to keep his nose out of books on particularly sunny days like these. He should be running around like a kid’ He said while looking up at the sun. It was too depressing a day for a it to be so sunny. It felt wrong, unnatural, almost like the creator of the universe was mocking them. Mikasa nodded which was quickly followed by a hug with him and Armin. It was a rare occurrence, but she welcomed it and just as she began wishing it would never end the departure announcements were yelled.

The arms surrounding them suddenly disappeared as they watched the figure of Armin’s grandfather walk away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I finished writing this chapter 5 minutes ago so I hope it's good.
> 
> This chapter kind of hurt me to write because Armin should never be sad. But good news is the next chapter will be an Eren PoV and then, just after that, finally a Levi PoV. I am way too excited to write Levi into the story.
> 
> Comments and Kudos appreciated :)


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay on this chapter
> 
> These past two weeks I have been finalizing important assignments for senior year and my insomnia reached its peak. I started to fall asleep at random times of the evening without being able to even work on the chapter let alone eat dinner some nights. I am still dealing with the consequences but I plan to return to the one chapter week schedule as of now. 
> 
> This was an important chapter for me so I wanted to make sure I tried my best, regardless of the current situation. 
> 
> I really hope you enjoy :D

The rusted metal creaked as four members of the military combined their strength and pulled down the lever. One-hundred and fifty-thousand people filtered out through the gate. One thought was on everybody’s mind: _why me- why was I picked out of everyone to save humanity?_ The pitch the government had given out was that for the sake of humanity a quarter of a million people would be sent out to reclaim Wall Maria. No training was given, no equipment fit to fight more than a child were handed out, protective gear was optional, and if wanted, used scraps of leather fashioned into a top were lent out. The word _lend_ was used as motivation. Such a simple word yet the meaning was significant. It insinuated that they would return, that this wasn’t just a mission to rid the city of mouths to feed. Everyone knew the _true_ plan, but some were either too in denial or confident in their skills to accept it.

The air was calm save for the occasional murmur. Some felt brave, some felt ready, some were sweating profusely in fear, but none truly knew what was to come. Some had seen titans, big and small, fast and slow, some had only heard rumors. It was a giant mess of strangers filing out a rusty gate unaware of their future.

The second half of the group was to be sent out in the early evening due to the sheer numbers. Soldiers lined the outside of the wall, tasked with enforcing that no one escapes. They were attached to thin wires that connected to the wall using hook-like technology. Most of those leaving the wall had never seen such technology and were unaware that the mission was dangerous enough for those staying at the wall to warrant the need for them.

The first leg of the journey was a simple but tiresome 40 minutes of walking. People chatted and morale grew. No titans had been sighted and conversations began to center around the possibility that they may never encounter one.

Just as defenses were down and laughter had become a common filler of the silence a faint noise could be heard in the distance.

The sound grew louder until most in the crowd could hear and _feel_ the footsteps hastily approaching. Those that had once felt cocky and confident, deciding to lead the group, were the first to get visuals on what was making the sound. Grotesque humanoid creatures sprinted towards them with intent. Their gangly limbs flailed unnervingly around as the rest of the group was made aware of the titans. Seeing over the crowd was impossible but soon that wasn’t necessary as the titans towered over them. The smile permanently plastered on the face of one of the taller titans scarred many leaving them completely frozen. Screams for help began erupting as the titans picked up civilians. Butter knives stored away as extra defense were useless against the crushing force of the titans’ hands and the sharpness of their teeth as their jaws unhinged for a more terrifying effect. What had once been silence was met with horrified shrieks and general bloodshed. They were neither equipped nor ready for this. 

* * *

Eren had been roaming for a couple of months, frequently popping back into the forest for some meat and rest. Titans kept on appearing out of nowhere as though they came from within the walls instead of just outside. He had not seen any titans for a couple of weeks and the boredom had led to shifting experiments. He had discovered that he could shift up to as long as a day, sunset to the following sunset, and shift as much as four times a day if necessary. With every shift came an awkward decrease in strength and muscle mass as though the process was eating away at him.

While on his route to test out the strength he held during his fourth daily shift he noticed some smaller titans sprinting across an open field. It had been a while since he’d seen one, so he followed them with his eyes. Off to the distance were a few more titans running in the same direction, so he followed but at a slower pace being acutely aware of his major decrease in energy.

Once he caught up eight titans appeared in his line of sight.

He noticed a huge crowd of people by the Titan’s feet. Their movements appeared erratic and tense, similar to bugs. The Titans weren’t small by any nature but Eren still towered above them. He sprinted towards some of the smaller ones hoping to have less distraction when he turned to the blonde thirteen-meter one that had found itself in the center of the group. Its all-too-human hand reached down and grabbed two people at random, bringing them back up towards its mouth. 

His ears had become significantly more sensitive to sound due to his need to listen for deer in the forest which allowed him to hear the screams of those being devoured. He wanted to help them and luckily for them, he was in the mood to test out his abilities.

One of the lanky titans that reached his waist grabbed onto him and pulled at his arm. Eren attempted to fling it away but it held on tightly and used its nails for grip. Another titan from behind, this time reaching his shoulder grabbed his hair back. Eren’s footing became unstable and he pushed down on the third titan’s head to stabilize himself. When it didn’t work, they all fell to the ground. He was forced flat on the ground as all the titans attempted to bite his nape. A small 7 meter one, the one he had failed to use for stabilization barely managed to reach over him before Eren grabbed it by the ankle and flung it on the opposite side.

The two titans left unharmed stopped their attack momentarily to watch as it landed a few meters further before turning back even more determined. With less weight on his side, Eren could once again attempt to stand up and after a lengthy half-hour of punches to the chin, another titan fell to the ground motionless. Once he was finally fully standing again, Eren noticed that another three titans had arrived since he had been pushed to the ground. He was now surrounded once again. Having failed his goal of lessening the load of titans he rushed towards the tallest one.

It hadn’t moved since Eren had first seen it but it was now surrounded by more dead bodies than live ones. Those that escaped were grabbed by the smaller ones. Eren observed as the blond bob of hair on the titan swayed back and forth as it reached for another pair. He grabbed onto its shoulder before it could get anyone and hardened his knuckles. Smaller titans grabbed at his ankles and knees, trying to trip him. Even with his increased strength, he had not considered fighting so many enemies as once. His irritation was starting to overwhelm him.

Using his left hand on the titan’s shoulder to keep himself firmly standing, he connected his right fist to its face. The blond titan simply smiled wider, opening up her jaw and bending forward to finish the fight in a single blow. Looking at the titan now Eren felt a twinge of familiarity when they made eye contact. His head filled with the sounds of his own screams yelling ‘NO’ and crying, the memory sending shocks of pain to his head and heart. All this did was give him more determination. He had to end this now.

The titans at his feet had him nearly buckle due to pressure and with every punch came to a tougher blow of frustration. In a final attempt to show dominance against the tall titan, he roared as loudly as possible, warning others to stay far away from him. What he hadn’t expected was the immediate effect. The titans all let go of him but instead of backing away, they headed for what he had considered the leader. The wide smile of the blond never faltered, even as it descended to the ground.

Eren had no clue what had just happened. He could tell though that any attempts to understand it would be futile. The group of titans seemed to completely ignore his presence now, fully focused on devouring the titan beneath them. He straightened his knees and looked at the people below. All that was left was a small crowd of huddled humans. This was Eren’s chance to reunite with others like him. If he shifted back, he could finally get a start on retrieving his memories, but something was holding him back. He _wasn’t like them_. They were humans, _just humans_. They didn’t seem to have the ability to shift and he wasn’t sure they’d welcome him considering his titan form.

Having accomplished his goal, _testing his strength,_ he headed back towards the forest, not before glancing back one more time as the group helped the injured and continued forwards. He couldn’t tell where they were going but he truly hoped they would get there safely. If he ever saw them again, he would help them once more, hoping to reunite with them as a human.

* * *

Hannes stood against the wall like he had since the early hours of the morning. Being _outside_ the walls somehow felt more useless than just drinking inside them. One of the guys to the left had been asleep for the past hour and they hadn’t seen anything out of the ordinary since the first and only group of resistors had tried to make it back into the wall.

He had been told the previous week that his job was to ensure _nothing, and no one_ made it back into the walls which just cemented the theory that those sent out to fix Wall Maria were simply sent out to make more space for those in the walls. He had no family sent out so he could only imagine the consequences this would have on the families of those who were sent to die. The second group was to be sent out in just two hours and he wasn’t sure how he’d face them as they left considering they were all as good as dead the moment they stepped outside the wall. He wasn’t one for guilt but even with the alcohol in his system drowning out his conscience, his heart stung.

Just as he began following in his neighbor’s footsteps and resting his eyes, he heard some commotion to his right. A man was running from the direction of the first group and he seemed very out of breath. Hannes sprinted over to assess the situation. He was one of the only higher-ranked soldiers securing the walls so it would likely be on him to decide what to do.

The man was exhausted and seemed to have been running for the better half of an hour. His words were slurred and his breath ragged. There were splatters of blood all over his clothes leaving little to the imagination as to what could have caused it.

‘What are you doing here?! Did you desert the mission?!’ One of the soldiers yelled down at the man who was clearly disoriented.

‘One of the tita- it-’ He fumbled out.

‘What are you saying, speak more clearly!’ The older soldiers were losing patience fast and the younger recruits looked lost as to what to do. They stayed silent awaiting orders on how to proceed.

Hannes placed his hand on the older soldier’s shoulder. ‘Let him finish what he was saying’ he turned to the man; ‘What’s your name? What happened, you know the consequence of deserting right?’ he let out calmly.

‘My name is Neal. Nearly e-everyone is dead. I tri-tried to help but-’ Neal hiccupped. He was reliving the scene and had a hard time getting words out between the flashes of the massacre. He took a deep breath and started up again.

‘About an hour into the mission we encountered the titans-. They’re far worse than I could have ever imagined.’ He took a deep breath again. ‘They wiped most of us out and I thought I was gone for good but one of the titans- it-’ Neal looked for the right word to describe what it had done.

‘It helped us’

The soldiers stared at him in disbelief and then a few of the recruits burst out laughing, probably too tipsy to even consider the possibility. One glare from Hannes had them shut up instantly.

‘How is that even possible?’ one of the soldiers asked.

‘We all thought we would die when it walked towards us. It was the tallest one there and by far the strongest since it defeated three other titans at once by itself. When it reached us though it just grabbed onto another titan and began punching it. I couldn’t believe my eyes; it roared and the other titans fell in a trance, just runnin’ towards the first titan as though it was their main target now’

Hannes stared for a second. He couldn’t believe it. Titans didn’t help humans and at most play-fought with each other. This man must have become delusional. It wasn’t a rare occurrence for those that returned from missions with the Survey Corps to be completely out of their minds after their first titan sighting, but this felt different.

Should he report this unusual sighting to the higher up and face the possibility of being laughed out of a job or send the man back with the threat of death if he returned before reclaiming the walls. What would the commander even do upon hearing the possibility of the existence of an intelligent titan?

The silence dragged on uncomfortably. The soldiers stared between each other and Neal kept eye contact, daring anyone to question his story. Hannes made up his mind and signaled for the younger recruits to open the gate. Maybe he was just holding on to childish hope but he truly wanted to believe that somewhere out there was a titan that meant humanity no harm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NEXT CHAPTER IS LEVI.
> 
> I read and respond to all comments, kudos are appreciated :D


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